It’s already the first of May. I just don’t seem to be getting hold of the year that seems to be passing by so quickly. It seems like as though the year 2018 has just begun, but here we are already in the month of May, with almost half the year having gone by.
Challenges in life are aplenty
I heave a sigh of relief as the A to Z Challenge comes to an end. It was a month of daily blogging, reading, commenting and sharing posts of others. Unlike the previous two years, this time around, I was far more relaxed and seldom fretted about the whole challenge. For one, I had my posts ready well in advance. I had my reading list organized on Feedly and also allotted specific time slots during the day, when I would be sitting in front of my laptop. This helped me to sail through the challenge with ease.
Challenges indeed are aplenty in life. Where some are specifically to give materialistic results, others are purely for our own self-satisfaction. The A to Z challenge is one such, where on completion you smile and give yourself a pat on the back. Almost all challenges have certain similarities. They instill an element of discipline and focus. Challenges stress on the importance of preparation, teaching you to set limits and understand your capability. Despite my travel in the month of April, I did manage to complete the challenge, much to my satisfaction.
Mid-life crisis is for real and it can strike one and all
Despite the blogging challenge, the day to day personal challenges bogged me down. I found myself over thinking, trying to seek answers to some deep probing questions. There were moments when I totally would lose my mind, making some rash decisions. Seeing me in a state of turmoil, a dear friend of mine, suspected mid-life crisis to be the culprit. Midlife Crisis??? And me?? Well, I have always dismissed this whole notion as a ridiculous state of mind and totally inconsequential to life. But then I may be wrong. Midlife crisis can happen to anyone, and it is characterized by a strong desire for change. People respond to it in different ways.
The universe does send you messages- well in its own way
In an effort to snap out of the turmoil that my mind was reeling under, I decided to consciously take time off to be by myself. I spent time listening to music that made me feel good, read more, and went out for long drives. I played games with the kids and laughed out loud at their small inanities. Just as I was beginning to feel a lot more positive, a friend of mine gifted me a little Buddha statue, co-incidentally on the day before Buddha Purnima. Under normal circumstances, I would have just accepted it as a token of her love. But somehow this time around, it felt like as though the universe was trying to tell me something. To be at peace, to lay to rest unknown anxieties and to focus more on what’s the real thing around me. The universe sure has its own power and ways to communicate to you.
Moms need their moms too
It’s a strange relationship moms and grown up daughters share. We argue on almost everything under the sun, sulk a lot much to each other’s dislike and, resist opinions. Yet, when there is an issue, the first person an adult daughter would turn to is her mother. With my kiddo going through yet another episode of being unwell, it was my mom who came to my rescue. Her spiritual thoughts comforted me; her power of listening coupled with her words of hope smoothed my nerves and kept me at ease. I realized you may have become a mom, but you still seek your own, when life binds you in a crisis. You may have the most loving partner, yet you still want her warmth around you.
Not making dinner every night doesn’t make me a bad mom
We mothers are the craziest bunch. We set high expectations for ourselves and then feel guilty when we are unable to accomplish it in entirety. Healthy, home cooked meal, three times a day on the table has always been my mantra. I plan my menus well in advance, stock up the kitchen adequately and spend a good 45 minutes cooking up every meal. If I am unable to deliver this, I begin to reek in guilt for not having given the kids a proper meal. But with the heat soaring in the month of April, it was immensely difficult to get through the 45 minutes in the kitchen, three times a day. Hence, I began to complete my cooking in the morning, when the temperatures were slightly lower. What was cooked in the morning was served for all three meals of the day. The set up worked perfectly fine, and in fact I realized I had far more time for myself, as well as for the kids. Not sure if this made me a better mom, but it sure did make me a happier one!
With May, I am excited about the approaching summer vacations and my travel plans. I once read that the best things you can give your children are happy memories that they can carry with them for a life time. I am hoping I am able to create loads of good memories for them and for myself too.