With the close of the year 2014, I sit with a mixed bag of feelings. 2014 is a year that will remain in my mind for years to come. A year I feel changes -positive ones. Yes and I feel it from within. A growth of positive thoughts, a growth of better understanding, and a growth of a sense of calmness.
I have always been a person filled with anxieties, fears and insecurities. You could blame it on multiple factors. The environment I grew up in, upbringing and influences of school. It did get better after I got married though. “A ” has been an awesome husband and extremely supportive of me. Yet my conflicts within have resulted in several other relationships of mine turning sour. Over the years I lost friendships and the care some dear friends would have for me.
But now as I stand on the threshold of 2014, I leave all these behind. I feel better.
2014 a year I lost my dad to Colon cancer. He had a long drawn fight and each one of us would pep him up and pushed him to fight till the end. Yet he succumbed to the deadly diseases on OCtober 17. I’ll never forget his last few days. If fighting the disease was painful the end was even worse. And more painful for us the care givers, to see a man, who was once so majestic, in pain. Will miss him always.
” A” was out for most parts of the year leaving me with the girls. Though it was difficult without “A”, I managed to hold fort managing them. I am glad in a way to get that time as it helped me introspect. I picked up reading and of course blogging.
I don’t know what the year ahead holds for me. Life would go on and the normal routine would continue past the date of 1st Jan 2015. But its a thought that I would carry with me that I am maturing and probably becoming a better person.